Casting the Chicago White Sox As AMC's Mad Men

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Jul 31, 2014; Detroit, MI, USA; Chicago White Sox center fielder Adam Eaton (1) receives congratulations from first baseman Jose Abreu (79) after scoring in the eighth inning against the Detroit Tigers at Comerica Park. Mandatory Credit: Rick Osentoski-USA TODAY Sports

The 2014 MLB offseason is underway, as is the offseason for AMC’s popular television series Mad Men. Let’s assume, for some tragic reason, a strike by the Screen Actor’s Guild perhaps, AMC were forced to temporarily recast the hit series. Let’s also assume, for some strange reason, they were forced to choose their male characters from the talented acting pool of the Chicago White Sox. Which current White Sox players would fill the roles as AMC’s Mad Men?

Peter Campbell: OF Avisail Garcia

Peter Campbell is a talented young partner at Sterling Cooper & Partners. However, his talent is accompanied by a heady sense of ambition that sometimes finds him at odds with co-workers and family members. He’s a boss at signing new accounts and knows how to keep them on the books. In between schmoozing clients, Peter tends to spend his free time wooing the ladies. He’s had an office fling with co-worker, Peggy Olsen, and slept with the wife of a man with whom he is well acquainted. His affection for Peggy led to a scuffle with fellow account man, Ken Cosgrove. He also participated in a classic workplace altercation with Lane Price in Season 5.

Avisail Garcia was rated as the Tigers’ #2 prospect prior to the 2013 season, according to SBNation. While injuries have slowed his emergence as a premier offensive threat, he has shown flashes of brilliance that validate prior expectations. However, like young Peter Campbell, Avisail Garcia may not be a stranger to workplace drama resulting from his womanizing ways.

There are rumors, according to the Inquisitr, Detroit traded their promising prospect, and later Prince Fielder, because Avisail slept with Prince’s wife, Chanel Fielder, which caused tension in the clubhouse. Whether these rumors are true or not, the White Sox were happy to scoop Garcia up in the three team trade that brought him to Chicago in 2013. I’m sure AMC’s casting crew would be just as happy to cast the talented young prospect as the ambitious Peter Campbell.

Sep 6, 2014; Cleveland, OH, USA; Chicago White Sox starting pitcher Jose Quintana (62) reacts after giving up a home run in the fourth inning against the Cleveland Indians at Progressive Field. Mandatory Credit: David Richard-USA TODAY Sports

Harry Crane: SP Jose Quintana

Harry Crane is an affable hard-working gentleman. He benefits the company through his growing network of contacts in the television and entertainment industry, quietly becoming an indispensable employee. However, Harry is often left with the short end of the stick. After realizing he is worth more to Sterling Cooper, he demands a salary increase and promotion. Unfortunately, negotiations are not Harry’s forte, so he settles for the promotion and a meager salary increase. In a scene from Season 5 below, Roger Sterling bribes Mr. Crane into give up his nice office in exchange for Peter Campbell’s homely abode, but not before Harry admits to making fun of Megan Draper’s lyrical rendition of “Zubi Zu.” Poor Harry just can’t catch a break.

White Sox starting pitcher Jose Quintana knows a thing or two about hard-luck. He’s been a dependable pitcher for the White Sox for the last three seasons, and apart from his wins total, had a spectacular 2014. Despite posting an ERA under 4.00 the last three seasons, and reaching 200 innings pitched the last two, Quintana has only 24 major league wins to his credit, an average of eight per season. ESPN‘s Doug Padilla even discussed the possibility of the White Sox trading Quintana for a quality right-handed starter. No respect I tell you, no respect.

Granted, trading Quintana is a long shot, as the organization views him as an integral part of the team’s nucleus. It’s not hard to see, though, that Quintana’s commitment to his craft has not been matched by results in the wins column or recognition around the league. I think AMC would agree that Jose Quintana is just the type of hard-working hard-luck individual that would fill the role of Harry Crane very well.

Jul 10, 2014; Boston, MA, USA; Chicago White Sox center fielder Adam Eaton (1) scores a run against the Boston Red Sox during the first inning at Fenway Park. Mandatory Credit: Mark L. Baer-USA TODAY Sports

Ken Cosgrove: OF Adam Eaton

Ken Cosgrove is another up-and-comer at SC&P. He’s talented, like Peter Campbell, but good-humored instead of manipulative. He bests Campbell for the Account Director position by signing key accounts for the firm. However, he is not invited to later become part of the new firm created when Roger Sterling, Bert Cooper, Don Draper, and Lane Price leave Sterling Cooper. Wrongs are righted when Ken is invited back into the fold, and eventually becomes the lead account man on the General Motors account. Despite Ken’s commitment to his work, the General Motors team was more committed to drinking, driving, and playing with firearms. As a result, Ken returned from his business trip a little worse for the wear.

Ken Cosgrove GIF

Adam Eaton is a talented young outfielder the White Sox were lucky enough to grab in a trade with the Arizona Diamondbacks prior to the 2014 season. Eaton is a good-natured young man who works hard day in and day out. He’s a positive source of energy in the clubhouse and his contributions on the field are just as positive. Eaton finished the 2014 season with a .300 batting average as the White Sox leadoff hitter, and earned a gold glove nomination in center field.

Adam is also no stranger to taking his lumps on the field. Eaton has found himself on the disabled list a few times as the result of a collision with the center field wall or a strained muscle from his all-out effort. For Adam, injuries are just another part of the job. I’m sure the fellas at AMC would agree that Adam Eaton’s care-free demeanor and ability to sacrifice his body would make him the perfect replacement for Ken Cosgrove.

Aug 30, 2014; Chicago, IL, USA; Chicago White Sox starting pitcher Chris Sale (49) throws a pitch against the Detroit Tigers during the first inning at U.S Cellular Field. Mandatory Credit: Mike DiNovo-USA TODAY Sports

Roger Sterling: SP Chris Sale

At first glance, some might find it odd I am nominating young Chris Sale to fill the shoes of one of SC&P’s oldest members, Roger Sterling. Hear me out. Roger is an accomplished, cagey veteran in his industry. Sterling is the name that headlines the SC&P firm, as well as, the firm it was born out of. Roger may not be an everyday player in the field like Ken Cosgrove or Pete Campbell, but when his skills are needed, he slips in, orders a vodka martini and casually works his magic. He knows something his clients don’t know, and they want to know it, but he doesn’t seem to care if they do. He’d be happy to tell them, though. I mean, why not? Sip, handshake, repeat. That’s how Roger Sterling seals a deal and steals the show.

However, he’s not without his faults. He’s traded gin for vodka and Smirnoff for Stoli. He embodies every trend on Madison Avenue hoping to prolong his relevance. He’s afraid of not being in the game. He’s trying to outrun, or better yet, ignore irrelevance.

He can’t be out on the field every day, but when the team needs him every fifth start, he calmly takes his place on the mound and he does what he is paid to do; he wins.

Chris Sale is the ace of the White Sox pitching staff. He hung around the Cy Young conversation throughout the 2014 season by posting a 2.17 ERA with 208 strike outs. It’s been this way for years. Sale will be entering his sixth season in the majors next year, having already earned three All-Star appearances. He can’t be out on the field every day, but when the team needs him every fifth game, he calmly takes his place on the mound and he does what he is paid to do; he wins. He’s won 40 games in the last three years, and even that total seems unfairly low, given what he’s done for the team.

He is calm, lanky, and unassuming, but he’s also ruthless. He may even be a bit paranoid, as an episode with the Detroit Tigers on August 24th, 2014 may have illustrated. Chris Sale hit Victor Martinez with a pitch in the sixth inning of the contest, then jawed at Victor and pointed to center field as V-Mart took his base. Martinez didn’t make it all the way to first before benches cleared. During the on-field song and dance that transpired as a result of Sale’s errant pitch, Avisail Garcia explained to his former teammate that Sale felt he was stealing signs with the aid of someone in center field. Later Sale was seen in the dugout making a gesture with his hands that looked like he was making goggles or, dare we say, binoculars over his eyes. Thus, binocular-gate was born.

Chris Sale is the marquee name on the White Sox pitching staff. He’s only 25, but he’s been around the block. He’s dominant, yet complex. He makes millions of dollars playing a professional sport that requires focus and consistency, but took the time to choose a word of the day to use in every post-start interview in 2014. He’s laid back, but he won’t be upstaged. He’s one of the most feared pitchers in the American League, but he might be a little paranoid himself. Sounds like the perfect guy to portray SC&P’s standard bearer, Roger Sterling.

Jul 8, 2014; Boston, MA, USA; Chicago White Sox first baseman Jose Abreu (79) takes the field for batting practice prior to a game against the Boston Red Sox at Fenway Park. Mandatory Credit: Bob DeChiara-USA TODAY Sports

Don Draper: 1B Jose Abreu

Don Draper. He doesn’t say much, but when does, people listen. He doesn’t have as long of a history with the firm as the other partners. Bert Cooper and Roger Sterling had both been doing just fine before Draper showed up. After they split with Sterling Cooper Advertising to form Sterling Cooper & Partners, Don didn’t even get his name on the mantle. It’s not that didn’t deserve it, it’s that he didn’t care. Make no mistake, SC&P doesn’t succeed without Draper.

Draper is deliberate. He picks a direction and stays the course. He is also flawed. His past is a mystery and his alcoholism is problematic. His competitiveness drives him to do whatever he needs to do to win. Whether he is competing for an account or the attention of a particular female, Draper won’t be denied.

Jose Abreu was signed by the White Sox prior to the 2014 season. White Sox fans are sure glad that he was. He’s cordial and soft-spoken, but his actions on the field speak loud and clear. He’s the probable 2014 American league Rookie of the Year. His stats, however, are more reminiscent of the “Big Hurt,” Frank Thomas, in his prime than a rookie. Abreu finished his first MLB season batting .317 with 36 home runs, 107 RBI, and a .964 OPS. Despite all the young talent on the White Sox roster, it became clear very quickly Abreu was the indispensable piece needed to build a championship contender around.

Abreu was born in Cuba and, like many Cuban players, his journey to the MLB is clouded in secrecy. We don’t know what Abreu went through in order to gain his citizenry in a country other than Cuba before becoming an eligible free agent. Whatever it was, I know it probably wasn’t easy. My mother’s family immigrated to South Florida from Cuba in 1962. I used to sit and listen to my grandmother tell her family’s story. I hope someday soon Abreu will tell us his.

Abreu is the guy. It’s Abreu’s team now. As he goes, so go the Sox. If he’s on fire, the offense will click; if his ankle is hurting, the team will be hurting. It’s a big responsibility for a sophomore, but judging by his determination, I think he’ll do just fine. If anyone should fill the lead role in this group of Mad Men, there’s no way it shouldn’t be Jose.

*All advanced statistic provided by baseball-reference.com

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Casting the Chicago White Sox As AMC’s Mad Men

Peter Campbell: OF Avisail Garcia

Harry Crane: SP Jose Quintana

Ken Cosgrove: OF Adam Eaton

Roger Sterling: SP Chris Sale

Don Draper: 1B Jose Abreu

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